Disenchanted

I think I've finally figured out what i want to do, what i need to do. I NEED to write. like NOW. I'm going to loose my sanity without it. And going crazy at the age of 15 isn't exactly what i had in my life plan.... okay going to write. maybe it will help me figure everything else out. i doubt it, but hey it's worth a shot am i right?

Lists of Firsts
1) i now have a private student i coach figure skating
2) i got a 61 on a math test. i haven't gotten that high in months!
3) i lost 15 points on a huge project because i forgot a bibliography ( when one wasn't specified.)
4) I UNDERSTOOD THE PAST TWO DAYS IN MATH.
5) I recieved a sincere apology about everything.
6) Gym is my favorite class
7) I'm going to be killed when my report card comes home
8) it's the first tuesday in almost 3 months without class. woohoo. a night full of homework and not getting a chance to bake kels cupcakes. :(.
9) MY blog title doesn't match any of what this post is about. Although it is the song i'm listening too.
10) andy wouldn't take the coffee cake.
11) i talked to preston while he's on his mission
12) i think that's all for now at least
Well, I'll post more later off to math homework and writing a novel. <3>

They Bring Me to You

There's absolutely nothing like preaching for the first time after roughly 12 classes and working so hard on your frist sermon, preaching it in front of your mom making her cry getting no weaknesses and tons of praise for something that truely was myself. This sermon was everything I've needed to say and just let roll of my chest after everythign that's happened this past year. This was my chance and I did it. I let the world know my secrets I admitted to God and i admitted to everyone that without him i don't know where I'd be. Maybe this sounds testimonial and I don't eman it to. Just, my goodness, the things you can accomplish with God is remarkable.

I talked about my Grandma's death... something I rarely do cause I feel like I can't complain I didn't know her in some ways maybe it shouldn't have affected me as much but it did. The fact that I never got to know a women who shaped my mother's life so much...it makes me feel jipped in a sense. My Grandma is someone i'm more and more like everyday with my works in the Church and with my love for music ( even though I'm not singing... oh how i wish she could have taught me how to sing) My mom pointed this out to me last night and maybe she's right. At GRandma's memorial service Pastor Crappy as we call him did a horrendous job with her sermon and just ruined that day. My mom on the way home goes " It's like despite what he did you got up there and you stood up for us and were all HA! Look what I can do even though you wrecked this for me!" And it true. HAHA on you pastor crappy. You ruined my Grandma's memorial but you'll never ruin my family. WE have each other. You wanna see God? Look at people loving THAT'S your evidence.


HAHA on all the people who screwed up this year. Yeah i'm talking about you the jerk who goes to school in Moscow and yeah i'm talking about you the snotty sophomore clarinet in wind ensamble. Phooey on you. Look at me now. I couldn't be better.

I'm doing what i love to do with the people who love and don't mind me. Things can be stressful but i'll always remember I have God's love. For that, I'm forever greatful. :)

HAHA adversity i OVERCAME you.


I FOUND MY LIMITLESS POSSIBILITES. <3

I'm Ready, I Am

PREACHING TONIGHT.

Finally. :D

I'm on the Up and Up

Currently, I'm listening to relient k and thinking about the awesome day that lies ahead. So much has changed since the last time I posted and the details aren't exactly necessary... pretty much I did get my answer from that person, we started over and now we're good friends. :D Today's a half day and one of my newer friends is walking me home. I can't wait to actually hang out with him! School has been really stressful so this half day is a huge sigh of relief! Marking period closes soon! Next weekend is the boyfriends play, Pippin I can't wait to see it! This weekend we're going to see another hs version of HSM Pinafore. Next week I'm also preaching for the first time and scared outta my mind about it. I can't wait to write about how that goes! Well i absolutely must get ready for school! I'll post more later, here's a neat quote for you day.

"And sometimes you sense how faithfully your life
is delivered, even though you can't read the address"

Sitting, Waiting, Wishing

Dear Readers,
Here I am. Sitting, waiting, wishing on for a message, while trying to write a sermon, thinking a lot about going back to sleep, and ignoring my massive amounts of homework that are in the back of my mind. Does well we'll talk tomorrow another way of saying I'll see you tomorrow or does it mean we'll actually talk and get things worked out? I just don't know anymore. Goodness I'm getting obsessed with the music playing in the back of this post that i'm writing maybe i'll leave a list. :) I think making this blog was more fun than writing a post thats so bad isn't it? I love writing...maybe its just the fact that there is too much other things racing through my mind at this moment in time.... Anyways i must get back to writing this sermon. I'm finally getting my story out and you have no idea how good it feels to see the truth on paper and know I've made it through. And as in the words of one of my favorite poems,

Soda Crackers " But I tell you the clear sunshiny days are here, at last. "